Wants and Needs: Inner Child & Adult Self

Image by OMAYARI

"If something in the deli aisle makes you cry
Of course I'll put my arm around you
And I'll walk you outside
Through the sliding doors
Why would I mind?

You're not a baby if you feel the world
All of the babies they can feel the world
That's why they cry

And when you're holding me
We make a pair of parentheses
There's plenty space to encase
Whatever weird way my mind goes
I know I'll be safe in these arms”

-The Blow, “Parentheses” from “Paper Television”

I love listening to love songs with a focus on relationship with self. This song is an ultimate love ballad for the inner child adult self relationship. 

Ignoring our own wants and needs is a form of self-abandonment.

Ignoring our own wants and needs (by not regularly checking in with ourselves to discover what they are) means ignoring wants and needs of our inner child (I keep it singular for simplicity yet it is possible to have more than one inner child). 

When we don’t check in with our own wants and needs it’s possible we may begin to subtly expect others or outside sources to meet these wants and needs. 

[FADE TO: scene of “Tricky territory of disempowerment”]

So, yeah, if you start to cry in the deli aisle, please walk yourself outside with the most gentle force of love from your spiritual heart. When your inner child is upset and asking for emotional attunement, take a pause and tune in to them. When you and/or your inner child feel the world - honor your incredible gift of sensitivity. 

What happens then? How do things shift??

This practice is inner compassionate inquiry - from adult self to inner child or from adult self to inner world. Taking a few breaths and dropping your breath and attention down to your heart, down to your your lower body and to the core of mother earth will help balance this exploratory, rewarding practice.